Sunday, October 18, 2009
#75 - Pinkberry
It was the decade when...
We couldn't stop eating sour ice cream.
Pinkberry fact sheet:
(The following are incontrovertibly true facts about the uber-trendy frozen yogurt chain known as "Pinkberry.")
Pinkberry yogurt is neither pink nor berry flavored.
Pinkberry yogurt tastes like, well...if you had walked into a frozen yogurt store 15 years ago and had been served Pinkberry you would have spit it back in your cup and asked for a refund because your ice cream was sour; that's what it tastes like.
Pinkberry's amazing contribution to world cuisine is that it sells itself as yogurt that tastes like yogurt.
Pinkberry is not yogurt.
Pinkberry, when confronted with the embarrassing fact that their yogurt wasn't yogurt, renamed the product "chilly bliss."
Pinkberry serves its yogurt-esque product in stores that look like the interior of the space station in 2001: A Space Odyssey.
Pinkberry has convinced people it's good for them.
Pinkberry has a celebrity clientele, and where Leo DiCaprio dines, so dines the nation.
Pinkberry only tastes good when you load it up with toppings, like big ass blackberries or Cap'n Crunch, which, of course, costs you more money.
Pinkberry's main competitor, Red Mango, serves yogurt that is neither red nor mango flavored.
Pinkberry is almost totally unknown to people outside New York and Los Angeles thereby letting these urbanites feel cooler about their overpriced dessert decisions.
Pinkberry serves a coffee flavor that tastes like a latte made with rancid cream.
Pinkberry is so addictive its nickname is Crackberry.
Pinkberry only serves one flavor at a time, so don't even ASK for a swirl!
Pinkberry is a special kind of delicious; even rats like it.
You AUGHT to remember.